Pardon Our Incoherence

This is a brand-new blog created on FanNation.com by myself and another member of the site, CavaBearDians. I hope you enjoy our sports banter. On a side note, this is the edited version of our show.

IT's HERE!

We promised you all a great show, and we have it. It's PTI, the first-ever edition on FanNation! Read as GOAT and I (CavaBearDians) take on some of the sports world's hottest topics.

(All times given in CST)



Cava (5:48:16 PM): WAIT!!!!

GOAT (5:48:20 PM): what?

Cava (5:48:21 PM): we have no name yet

Cava (5:48:55 PM): Hairy Brown Goat

GOAT (5:49:01 PM): no thats not our name

Cava (5:49:06 PM): i was kidding

GOAT (5:49:50 PM): what about Pardon the Interaction?

Cava (5:50:03 PM): Pardon the Incoherence

Cava (5:50:04 PM): YES!

GOAT (5:50:08 PM): i like that

GOAT (5:50:11 PM): Incoherence

Cava (5:50:16 PM): alright

GOAT (5:50:28 PM): lets do this

Cava (5:50:35 PM): HEY!!

Cava (5:50:41 PM): And welcome to PTI. No, we're not Wilbon and Kornheiser.

GOAT (5:50:54 PM): I'm GOAT

Cava (5:50:57 PM): And I'm Cava.

Cava (5:51:08 PM): And this is PARDON THE INCOHERENCE. We're the craziest blog you'll ever read, and the best ESPN knockoff, too.

GOAT (5:51:36 PM): Even if we don't make sense half the time.

Cava (5:51:43 PM): I'm brown, and he's a goat.

GOAT (5:52:00 PM): Fair enough. Let's get started with today's topics.

Cava (5:52:18 PM): Our first segment is called Quick Hits. Quick Hits is like PTI's rundown.We cover 5 topics in 25 minutes.

Cava (5:53:15 PM): 25 on the clock…

GOAT (5:54:30 PM): Well, our first topic is the NBA Playoffs. After the Spurs gave up a huge lead in Game 1 and got manhandled in Game 2, they came home to the Alamo City where they defeated the Lakers quite easily to put the series at 2-1.

Cava (5:55:16 PM): And on the other side of the country, the Celtics overcome their road woes, while the pistons break the Celtics hot streak at home, and we have quite a series in the ECF.

GOAT (5:55:37 PM): So, Cava, who do you like in these matchups?

Cava (5:55:47 PM): I'm bitter from last year, so I have the Lakers; I honestly think the Lakers can do this. You?

GOAT (5:56:47 PM): I'm taking the Lakers as well. They won't just lie down after going up 2 games to none like the Hornets did. This is a Lakers team that has some experience in the postseason with Derek Fisher and Kobe Bryant.

Cava (5:57:16 PM): Let's put it this way--if Kobe can play his game and share the ball, the Lakers go all the way.

GOAT (5:57:37 PM): Gotcha.

Cava (5:57:54 PM): Tell me about the ECF.

GOAT (5:58:58 PM): The Celtics finally won a game on the road. However, they also lost one in the Garden. The Pistons defense was terrible in the last few games, but I see them turning it around to take the series.

Cava (5:59:11 PM): Alrighty, so we both take the Lakers, and we’ll talk more about the rest a bit later.

Cava (5:59:18 PM): For our next topic we have the Mets.

GOAT (5:59:33 PM): If I might add, Rondo is the main problem for Boston. He doesn't make good decisions out there.

GOAT (5:59:38 PM): Continue, Cava.

Cava (5:59:56 PM): [glares] Willie Randolph stated earlier this week that he was viewed differently from white managers. How do you feel about this?

GOAT (6:00:35 PM): Well, I think he finally spoke his mind. I don't buy his apology at all. He was definitely put under pressure to make a public apology like he did. Do you think it was sincere?

Cava (6:00:49 PM): I don't know about the apology. I'm sure he was sorry, but for the right reasons? I don't know. But I think there's a bigger issue here. Randolph plays the race card. I hate when that happens--it cheapens what a problem racism really is.

Cava (6:02:05 PM): But at the same time, the Mets were rumored to have wanted to fire him--how do you feel about that?

GOAT (6:02:09 PM): He did play the race card and that probably wasn't the best approach, but I'm positive we all know that racism is still very prevalent in our country today. However, it would be a VERY bad idea for the Mets to fire him.

Cava (6:02:47 PM): I agree, the Mets shouldn't fire him.

Cava (6:03:33 PM): OK, let's move on. What's next, GOAT?

GOAT (6:04:14 PM): Next on our list of topics is the bad behavior of NFL players. It seems as though we read about a new athlete every day from the NFL who runs into trouble with the law. Your thoughts on this?

Cava (6:04:28 PM): First we had Cedric Benson, now Vince Young. Going back we had the whole Bengals' organization—it’s ridiculous.

GOAT (6:04:51 PM): And you can't forget about those ongoing problems such as Pacman Jones and Michael Vick.

Cava (6:04:57 PM): Of course.

GOAT (6:05:06 PM): As a whole, the League is having an image problem.

Cava (6:05:22 PM): We have real thugs, i.e. Pacman and Chris Henry, and then some not-so-real thugs like Vince Young and Ced Benson

GOAT (6:05:44 PM): As a Steelers fan, I appreciate your shots at the Bengals, by the way.

Cava (6:05:51 PM): I'm a Cleveland guy, so it's a fine line. Make the world a better place, punch a Steeler’s fan in the face…

GOAT (6:05:58 PM): But yeah, a couple pictures at a party never hurt anyone.

Cava (6:06:04 PM): Exactly. The guy was having a drink. And he was shirtless. People are always drinking. And they're always shirtless.

GOAT (6:06:31 PM): However, Goodell has to get the players on board with him so that the NFL doesn't continue tumbling downhill with stories such as these ones that keep surfacing.

Cava (6:06:36 PM): Heck, I bet half of you reading this are shirtless…

Cava (6:06:40 PM): If not pantless.

GOAT (6:06:52 PM): I swear I'm not.

Cava (6:06:53 PM): If the shoe fits, wear it.

GOAT (6:06:55 PM): Really, I'm not

Cava (6:06:59 PM): Riiiight…

Cava (6:07:09 PM): Goodell has been good. Still, he can make rules and punishments, but he can't force people to act a certain way. I'm serious when i say this--the NFL should have a definite policy--felonies mean you're out. Full-out ban, Pacman style.

GOAT (6:07:52 PM): I understand that, but they are giving a new meaning to the term "Rules are made to be broken."

Cava (6:08:09 PM): For misdemeanors, three strikes, you're out.

GOAT (6:08:16 PM): I agree with you there. Stricter penalties should reduce off-the-field problems.

Cava (6:08:22 PM): And for being a dillweed, you get to be ridiculed by the public.

GOAT (6:08:35 PM): Definitely.

Cava (6:08:41 PM): Less people commit a crime if you take something that matters to them.

GOAT (6:09:04 PM): Even though most are ridiculed already. (I'm talking to you, Mr. Owens)

Cava (6:09:20 PM): We'll leave it at that.

GOAT (6:34:32 PM): Anyway, what's our next topic?

Cava (6:34:43 PM): With ten minutes to go, the NBA Draft.

GOAT (6:35:00 PM): Ah, yes. How about the luck of the Bulls?

Cava (6:35:19 PM): They had a 1.7% chance of winning the draw, and the SOB’s did it.

GOAT (6:35:26 PM): Who should they take with the first pick?

Cava (6:35:38 PM): Does it matter? No matter who the Bulls draft, no matter how high, he ends up sucking.

Cava (6:36:13 PM): Now of course, they've had some hits, a la Michael Jordan, who was decent.

GOAT (6:36:20 PM): Yeah, I somewhat agree, but both Beasley and Rose have tremendous potential.

Cava (6:36:27 PM): Right

GOAT (6:36:32 PM): In this situation though, I'd take Derrick Rose.

Cava (6:36:34 PM): I'm a Beasley fan myself. You have to realize what the Bulls have.

GOAT (6:36:52 PM): There are trade rumors for Hinrich and with him gone, they will need Rose.

Cava (6:37:08 PM): If Hinrich leaves, then I’m ready to say Rose. But right now, they have a slew of at least decent guards. Ben Gordon is solid. Hinirich is decent. And I like Duhon.

GOAT (6:37:12 PM): Hopefully, they can get a interior offensive presence for him.

GOAT (6:37:38 PM): But not based on the team's needs, who do you think will have a better career: Beasley or Rose?

Cava (6:37:50 PM): Beasley for sure. He's the most talented player in this draft. The question is, what do the bulls want

GOAT (6:38:18 PM): Now, I doubt that. He is underweight for a 6-9 guy and will have trouble banging in the post as a power forward unless he develops some serious bulk.

Cava (6:38:31 PM): What if goes as a 3?

GOAT (6:38:55 PM): He's not so good a scorer as a 3 than as a 4.

Cava (6:39:01 PM): Imagine the lineup of Hinrich, Gordon, Beasley, Deng, and Noah. It's not too bad.

GOAT (6:39:12 PM): That's a small lineup though.

Cava (6:39:19 PM): They can play him as a big SF, and he can abuse the matchups. It is a small lineup, but Noah is the biggest the Bulls have. The Bulls are a small team.

GOAT (6:40:00 PM): Let's hypothesize, who would guard Dwight Howard or Kevin Garnett? Noah? He would be killed.

Cava (6:40:06 PM): They can’t. We already know. But Rose sure won't do it.

GOAT (6:40:21 PM): That is just more reason to trade Hinrich for someone in the post.

Cava (6:40:24 PM): Sure, but who can they get? Anderson Varejao may be on the market.

GOAT (6:40:45 PM): Eh...they would need to find a team in need of a point guard.

GOAT (6:40:52 PM): Who do you have going as the third pick?

Cava (6:41:07 PM): But I think at the third pick, Augustin wouldn't be bad, or Brooke Lopez. But remember-- I'm not too hot on draft topics, as I'm not a huge NCAA follower.

GOAT (6:42:54 PM): Lopez is the right choice in my opinion. Augustin going third is a little high for an undersized point guard, in my opinion.

Cava (6:43:00 PM): Sure, but he's very talented.

Cava (6:43:07 PM): Anyways, last topic for quick hits, as we near the end of time.

Cava (6:43:36 PM): SPYGATE!

GOAT (6:43:38 PM): As long as they don't take Mayo, they are fine. Let's just say I have some serious doubts about not only his play on the court but also his decisions off it.

Cava (6:43:47 PM): It won't go away, will it?

GOAT (6:43:56 PM): The media is blowing it way out of proportion now.

Cava (6:44:02 PM): Agreed. The issue is that the Pats DID cheat, but we all know that.

GOAT (6:44:22 PM): Just let it go. It won't happen again; the Pats have been penalized.

Cava (6:44:27 PM): But Goodell wants to pass the issue.

GOAT (6:44:39 PM): As he should, it is only further hurting his league.

Cava (6:44:41 PM): But we also know they cheated in the SB against the Rams. What can we do about it? Nothing.

GOAT (6:45:03 PM): Do you think Matt Walsh should take responsibility for his videotaping of the signals? Or is the Patriots' organization's fault?

Cava (6:45:19 PM): Pats are at fault. The other problem is, Senator Arlen Specter, an Eagles fan, keeps bringing it up.

GOAT (6:45:34 PM): Yeah, Specter has no business in this matter.

Cava (6:46:05 PM): Any last words?

GOAT (6:46:26 PM): I disagree with you. It is partially Matt Walsh's fault, too. As Mike & Mike in the Morning said, why would he keep these tapes from so long ago unless he was planning to reveal them to somewhat blackmail the Patriots?

Cava (6:46:39 PM): He wasn't planning jack…

GOAT (6:46:45 PM): It's ridiculous. He obviously knew what he was doing was wrong.

Cava (6:46:49 PM): He was forced to come out and reveal the truth. And he was paid by the Patriots, so why would rat on them right away?

GOAT (6:47:08 PM): He should have either revealed the truth as it was happening or just to let it go. Not now.

Cava (6:47:23 PM): We'll agree to disagreee.

Cava (6:47:30 PM): We're out of time on quick hits, a bit past actually. GOAT, tell them about our next segment

GOAT (6:50:47 PM): Buy or Sell, the game that was made famous by Around the Horn. Our first topic is Jason Taylor: Dolphin in Week 1?

Cava (6:51:05 PM): I like Jason Taylor, but I have a feeling he'll stay with the fins. I think Parcells is unreasonable. I’ll buy.

GOAT (6:52:18 PM): I'm buying that as well. Parcells is being a little ridiculous right now over it all, and it will settle down eventually. He will most definitely be in a Miami Dolphins uniform this season.

Cava (6:52:33 PM): If Parcells kept TO, he can keep Jason.

GOAT (6:52:46 PM): Good point. Haha.

Cava (6:52:53 PM): Buy or sell: Lakers-Celtics Finals.

GOAT (6:53:12 PM): Are you buying or selling this series reminiscent of something we would see in the 80s?

Cava (6:53:24 PM): I'm a buyer, too--both teams are truly amazing, and we'll have an instant classic. I'm assuming you buy. Am I right?

GOAT (6:55:06 PM): You're assuming wrong, buckethead. (Yeah, I went there.) The Celtics will not make the Finals. Their series is knotted up at 2 apiece right now and, as I mentioned earlier, Rajon Rondo is still making too many bad decisions on the court.

Cava (6:55:11 PM): Well, you know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me. The Celtics won't lose three games straight, and the Pistons will not win a game 7 in Boston.

GOAT (6:57:31 PM): The Pistons don't have to win three in a row. If they win tomorrow night, they'll have control of the series and a safe 3-2 lead.

Cava (6:58:24 PM): The Pistons need to win the next two games to win the series. I have to say it again: the Celtics won't be beaten in a game 7 at home

GOAT (6:59:07 PM): They don't necessarily need to. They've won in Boston before and they can do it again. They just have to make sure they take care of business at home in Game 6.

Cava (6:59:08 PM): And I just don't think the Pistons will win these two games.

GOAT (6:59:20 PM): Alright. Next topic.

Cava (6:59:21 PM): Game 7 is a whole new ballgame, my friend.

GOAT (6:59:33 PM): What do you got for us, Cava?

Cava (6:59:40 PM): Buy or sell? Brady Quinn starts for the Browns Week 1.

GOAT (7:00:01 PM): I'm selling it and fast.

Cava (7:00:06 PM): Why?

GOAT (7:00:29 PM): It's not going to happen.

Cava (7:00:33 PM): It is (I'm buying). The Browns gave up too much and pay him too much for him to ride the bench. I predict Derek Anderson will either be gone, or he'll be very unhappy on the bench, come week 1.

GOAT (7:01:19 PM): Money doesn't guarantee playing time.

Cava (7:01:24 PM): Truth. Still, there's a connection.

GOAT (7:02:02 PM): I guess, but the Browns will play the QB that will win them games, not who they are paying the most money.

Cava (7:02:12 PM): True again. So we'll just move on.

Cava (7:02:20 PM): Buy or sell--and we'll do them together, since they're related: Indians make the playoffs and Yankees make the playoffs.

GOAT (7:02:47 PM): I'm selling both. And I know you're at least buying the Indians. *coughhomercough* I know this may sound dumb, but I'm saying the A's grab the wild card.

Cava (7:03:25 PM): I buy the Tribe, sell the Yankees. The Tribe are in a crazy division. The White Sox can't play this well with this little talent for this long.

GOAT (7:03:54 PM): Yes, but the Indians are 1-9 in their last ten games!!!

Cava (7:04:07 PM): But the Tribe can't play this bad with this much talent for this long. They're very talented, but they're on a team slump.

GOAT (7:04:39 PM): Well, right now they are. Their starting rotation is great, but their offense is in a major slump right now.

Cava (7:04:45 PM): I agree. But we'll get out of it.

GOAT (7:04:59 PM): Keep telling yourself that.

Cava (7:05:08 PM): And the Yankees won't get in, because the Red Sox and maybe even the Rays will. Either the Rays or ChiSox take the ALWC.

GOAT (7:05:24 PM): At least we agree the last-place Yankees are in dire need of Posada and are starting to regret the firing of Torre, right?

Cava (7:05:31 PM): Yeah. Plus, they're a team of aging stars.

GOAT (7:05:44 PM): I say the Rays falter and go back to being normal.

Cava (7:05:51 PM): Maybe, but my Sox picks are solid.

GOAT (7:06:05 PM): The Sox are the only ones out of the AL East playing in the postseason.

Cava (7:06:12 PM): Sure

GOAT (7:06:17 PM): Well, that concludes Buy or Sell.

Cava (7:06:20 PM): Yep.

GOAT (7:06:23 PM): Time for an old segment to come back to life. I am, of course, referring to Game-Planning. Some of you may remember it from my college basketball blog. Well, it's back, and in a somewhat different form.

Cava (7:07:08 PM): It sure is.

GOAT (7:07:16 PM): Our highlight game is the Pistons visiting the Celtics. Who do ya got for Game 5, Cava?

Cava (7:07:27 PM): Celtics.

GOAT (7:07:36 PM): I'll take the Pistons.

Cava (7:07:42 PM): I'll tell you the keys.

GOAT (7:07:52 PM): Let's hear ‘em then. [aside] This should be good.

Cava (7:07:59 PM): The Celtics need to make their shots, because they don't come easy at all.

GOAT (7:08:11 PM): Not in the East, they don't. They wonder why the games never get out of the 80s.

Cava (7:08:22 PM): The crowd needs to be crazy. KG needs to play the way he did against the Cavs.

GOAT (7:08:42 PM): So are you saying the Celtics are screwed for Game 6 on the road?

GOAT (7:08:55 PM): I'll give you the keys for Detroit now.

Cava (7:08:57 PM): I think between Ray Allen, KG, and Double-P, they need 65 points.

GOAT (7:09:11 PM): As you said, we need to make our shots. They shot horribly in their Game 3 blowout loss.

GOAT (7:09:35 PM): Next, Rasheed Wallace ABSOLUTELY HAS TO make KG work on the defensive end. He needs to attack the rim and wear Garnett down. Billups needs to assert his dominance as the better point guard, which he obviously is. But he hasn't always shown it this series.

Cava (7:10:09 PM): Yeah, but can he maintain discipline (I'm referring to Rasheed)

GOAT (7:10:41 PM): He better, or the Pistons are gone from the playoffs. He needs to keep his composure. Two more technicals and he has to sit a game.

Cava (7:10:54 PM): Well, the PG position is interesting. Rondo is young, and can be either brilliant or awful on any given day. Billups hasn't been playing to par.

GOAT (7:11:19 PM): I agree with both of your points.

Cava (7:11:20 PM): And Cassell has been rightfully benched. Bring him in for big shots, otherwise, ride it, sucka.

GOAT (7:11:31 PM): Cassell was an unneeded asset to the team.

GOAT (7:11:45 PM): Unneeded asset. That's an oxymoron if I ever saw one.

Cava (7:11:58 PM): You put the moron in oxymoron. Moron.

GOAT (7:12:12 PM): Moving on...

Cava (7:12:20 PM): This is my segment from my SIFS blog. You may remember Game Balls and Lame Balls.

GOAT (7:12:44 PM): I do.

Cava (7:12:50 PM): It's our last segment tonight, and it goes like this. We'll each pick one or so concept, person, or team from sports. One that was good (Game) and the other that sucked (Lame).

Cava (7:14:01 PM): So without further adieu, GOAT, name your Lame Ball.

GOAT (7:14:12 PM): Jenna Jameson has made quite the career off it. I would hardly consider it lame, but I digress…

GOAT (7:14:52 PM): My lame ball goes to Joakim Noah. I mean, how dumb can you be?

Cava (7:15:01 PM): Pretty dumb, I guess.

GOAT (7:15:01 PM): I'd also like to give a co-lame ball to Danica Patrick.

Cava (7:15:08 PM): Impressive. Lame Tire maybe?

GOAT (7:15:21 PM): She's a pro athlete, yet acts like a 5-year-old with her temper tantrums.

Cava (7:15:34 PM): I think she had a right to be ticked.

GOAT (7:15:35 PM): Grow up and act like a responsible adult, Danica!

Cava (7:15:43 PM): She reads this blog, so I'm sure she’ll obey.

GOAT (7:15:48 PM): No need to act the way she did.

Cava (7:15:56 PM): She didn't actually DO anything.

GOAT (7:15:59 PM): Who does your Lame Ball go to?

Cava (7:16:05 PM): My Lame Ball has to go to idiot umpires. I mean, are you SERIOUS?! They miss 3 homerun calls in a pretty short timespan. IDIOTS!

GOAT (7:19:58 PM): Quite idiotic.

Cava (7:20:06 PM): Indeed. But like you, I'll co-Lame Ball this.

GOAT (7:20:23 PM): Be nice on the umps though, they are only human. It's not like they could replay the home run in their mind.

Cava (7:20:25 PM): I give one to the Indians offense. I mean, what the heck is going on here?

GOAT (7:20:53 PM): No argument here with the Indians. They are completely inept at hitting the baseball.

Cava (7:21:09 PM): We have the best rotation in baseball (yes, 'Zona fans, I said that) yet our offense...well, does what a Hoover does.

GOAT (7:21:31 PM): If it weren't for their pitching, they'd have the worst record in the MLB. Moving on to Game Balls. Who do you got?

Cava (7:21:37 PM): You go first.

GOAT (7:24:43 PM): Alright, I'll take Jon Lester. What a story he has made.

Cava (7:24:52 PM): Classy pick.

GOAT (7:25:25 PM): From all the problems he has had the last couple of years, this guy sure deserved it. He pitched a no-hitter, the 18th in Red Sox history, if my memory serves me.

GOAT (7:25:42 PM): Who are you taking?

Cava (7:27:02 PM): I'm gonna have to take David Ortiz.

GOAT (7:27:17 PM): He did publicly yell at the commish.

Cava (7:27:20 PM): It may sound like a weak pick, but I think it's important he speaks his mind. Selig is a loser.

GOAT (7:27:38 PM): I agree. Who calls a tie in an ASG?

Cava (7:27:50 PM): He's horrible at managing this league. He can't stop players from cheating, so he's going to try to mess with the pace of the game? What an idiot.

GOAT (7:28:14 PM): Add to the fact that he just banned Little Leagues from using Major League teams as the names of their teams.

Cava (7:28:26 PM): That's what I'm saying. Oritz gets a Game Ball for telling that man to shove it.

GOAT (7:28:43 PM): Good choice. Haha.

Cava (7:28:54 PM): ANNNNND that's our show.

Cava (7:29:01 PM): Hope you guys enjoyed it

GOAT (7:29:04 PM): That concludes the very first edition of what will hopefully be many editions of Pardon the Incoherence. Don't forget to send mail to either myself or Cava for our Mail Time segment, and for general suggestions on style, flow, and topics.

Cava (7:29:13 PM): This is Cava, rolling out

GOAT (7:30:01 PM): Have a nice week, peoples...


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